


Save Yourself

by dimitriCuddlemumpkins



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: I'm not sure if its really considered rizekane but they're kinda in it together so??, Other, how lil kaneki drove himself crazy, poem
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-24
Updated: 2014-09-24
Packaged: 2018-02-18 14:39:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2351969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dimitriCuddlemumpkins/pseuds/dimitriCuddlemumpkins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's better to be hurt than to hurt others<br/>I told myself that<br/>day after day after day</p>
            </blockquote>





	Save Yourself

He came in,

asked me to count down

I didn't understand

but I counted

one thousand, five hundred, ten, sane

the numbers were keeping me alive,

keeping me human

but with every piece he took

I felt far from it

but I hung on to those numbers

 

He came in,

asked me to choose which one to kill

but I knew what he was really asking

"which one would you like to save?"

I didn't want anyone to hurt

choose me, choose me, choose me

how could I possibly decide?

so _choose me_

I couldn't save them

**_choose me_ **

 

He came in,

asked me what sound a centipede makes

if it's in your brain

I didn't understand at first,

I'm not sure if I understand now

but that click _click_ **_clicking_** ,

until my screams turned to laughter

I don't understand

but I still hear that clicking,

just in a different tone

that terrible clicking

is now your voice

 

You came in,

asked me why I was so weak

but you knew the answer

you just wanted to make me say it,

to live it

your whispered taunts in my ear

_click_

telling me what I've done wrong

_click_

how I'd never succeed

**_click_ **

until I grew up

 

You came in,

asked me why I was fighting

_"for your friends?"_

you scoffed,

_"pathetic"_

you told me to do it for myself,

to save myself and not worry about friendship

because it wasn't about them anyway

_selfish selfish selfish_

I need to protect everyone

someone help me,

please

 

You came in,

asked me why I wouldn't accept you

but I'm not a monster

not like you

you laughed

_"if I'm a monster,"_

**_click_ **

_"then what are you?"_

I'm human

humanhumanhumanhuman

I knew you wouldn't stop until I was broken

so I shattered

 

You came in,

asked me why I was so angry

but I continued to scream,

crying for help,

I didn't want to be alone

choose me, choose me, choose me,

I don't want to be alone

so _choose me_

Mom..

please..

**_choose me_ **

 

You came in,

asked me what I'd do now

I would fight

not for them,

but for me

you said I was like you

you were wrong

I was nothing like you

you're not even really here

I knew that

but I needed you

not for comfort,

but for food

 

So I came in,

asked what if felt like

to be the one being feasted upon

all you said was that I did well

that I would be better off without you

that I'll learn what to truly fight for

but I still hear that clicking sometimes

though I can't remember when

but I learned from you

and I chose me

 

_"It's better to be hurt than to hurt others"_

that's a lie

hurt people,

save yourself

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first actual poem I've ever written so sorry for my inexperience. It might be a little all over the place so sorry again. Feedback is appreciated! Thank you for reading!


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